diff --git a/src/components/dms/MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter.tsx b/src/components/dms/MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter.tsx
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..7b1a133a6e
--- /dev/null
+++ b/src/components/dms/MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter.tsx
@@ -0,0 +1,75 @@
+import {View} from 'react-native'
+import {AppBskyActorDefs} from '@atproto/api'
+import {msg, Trans} from '@lingui/macro'
+import {useLingui} from '@lingui/react'
+
+import {atoms as a, useTheme} from '#/alf'
+import {Button, ButtonText} from '#/components/Button'
+import {useDialogControl} from '#/components/Dialog'
+import {Divider} from '#/components/Divider'
+import {LeaveConvoPrompt} from '#/components/dms/LeaveConvoPrompt'
+import {ReportConversationPrompt} from '#/components/dms/ReportConversationPrompt'
+import {Text} from '#/components/Typography'
+
+export function MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter({
+  // recipient: initialRecipient,
+  convoId,
+  hasMessages,
+}: {
+  recipient: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic
+  convoId: string
+  hasMessages: boolean
+}) {
+  const t = useTheme()
+  const {_} = useLingui()
+  // const recipient = useProfileShadow(initialRecipient)
+
+  const leaveConvoControl = useDialogControl()
+  const reportControl = useDialogControl()
+
+  return (
+    <View style={[hasMessages && a.pt_md, a.pb_xl, a.gap_lg]}>
+      <Divider />
+      <Text style={[a.text_md, a.font_bold, a.text_center]}>
+        {/* {isBlocking ? (
+          <Trans>You have blocked this user</Trans>
+        ) : (
+          <Trans>This user has blocked you</Trans>
+        )} */}
+      </Text>
+
+      <View style={[a.flex_row, a.justify_between, a.gap_lg, a.px_md]}>
+        <Button
+          label={_(msg`Leave chat`)}
+          color="secondary"
+          variant="solid"
+          size="small"
+          style={[a.flex_1]}
+          onPress={leaveConvoControl.open}>
+          <ButtonText style={{color: t.palette.negative_500}}>
+            <Trans>Leave chat</Trans>
+          </ButtonText>
+        </Button>
+        <Button
+          label={_(msg`Report`)}
+          color="secondary"
+          variant="solid"
+          size="small"
+          style={[a.flex_1]}
+          onPress={reportControl.open}>
+          <ButtonText style={{color: t.palette.negative_500}}>
+            <Trans>Report</Trans>
+          </ButtonText>
+        </Button>
+      </View>
+
+      <LeaveConvoPrompt
+        control={leaveConvoControl}
+        currentScreen="conversation"
+        convoId={convoId}
+      />
+
+      <ReportConversationPrompt control={reportControl} />
+    </View>
+  )
+}
diff --git a/src/screens/Messages/Conversation.tsx b/src/screens/Messages/Conversation.tsx
index b8b0bfe0d3..0abbc8c2b9 100644
--- a/src/screens/Messages/Conversation.tsx
+++ b/src/screens/Messages/Conversation.tsx
@@ -23,9 +23,11 @@ import {useDialogControl} from '#/components/Dialog'
 import {VerifyEmailDialog} from '#/components/dialogs/VerifyEmailDialog'
 import {MessagesListBlockedFooter} from '#/components/dms/MessagesListBlockedFooter'
 import {MessagesListHeader} from '#/components/dms/MessagesListHeader'
+import {MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter} from '#/components/dms/MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter'
 import {Error} from '#/components/Error'
 import * as Layout from '#/components/Layout'
 import {Loader} from '#/components/Loader'
+import {ChatDisabled} from './components/ChatDisabled'
 
 type Props = NativeStackScreenProps<
   CommonNavigatorParams,
@@ -193,14 +195,23 @@ function InnerReady({
         <MessagesList
           hasScrolled={hasScrolled}
           setHasScrolled={setHasScrolled}
-          blocked={moderation?.blocked}
           footer={
-            <MessagesListBlockedFooter
-              recipient={recipient}
-              convoId={convoState.convo.id}
-              hasMessages={convoState.items.length > 0}
-              blockInfo={blockInfo}
-            />
+            convoState.status === ConvoStatus.Disabled ? (
+              <ChatDisabled />
+            ) : moderation?.blocked ? (
+              <MessagesListBlockedFooter
+                recipient={recipient}
+                convoId={convoState.convo.id}
+                hasMessages={convoState.items.length > 0}
+                blockInfo={blockInfo}
+              />
+            ) : convoState.pendingAcceptance ? (
+              <MessagesListPendingAcceptFooter
+                recipient={recipient}
+                convoId={convoState.convo.id}
+                hasMessages={convoState.items.length > 0}
+              />
+            ) : null
           }
         />
       )}
diff --git a/src/screens/Messages/components/MessagesList.tsx b/src/screens/Messages/components/MessagesList.tsx
index 071ce1cd71..27013d0d9c 100644
--- a/src/screens/Messages/components/MessagesList.tsx
+++ b/src/screens/Messages/components/MessagesList.tsx
@@ -31,7 +31,6 @@ import {
   EmojiPickerState,
 } from '#/view/com/composer/text-input/web/EmojiPicker.web'
 import {List, ListMethods} from '#/view/com/util/List'
-import {ChatDisabled} from '#/screens/Messages/components/ChatDisabled'
 import {MessageInput} from '#/screens/Messages/components/MessageInput'
 import {MessageListError} from '#/screens/Messages/components/MessageListError'
 import {ChatEmptyPill} from '#/components/dms/ChatEmptyPill'
@@ -78,13 +77,11 @@ function onScrollToIndexFailed() {
 export function MessagesList({
   hasScrolled,
   setHasScrolled,
-  blocked,
   footer,
 }: {
   hasScrolled: boolean
   setHasScrolled: React.Dispatch<React.SetStateAction<boolean>>
-  blocked?: boolean
-  footer?: React.ReactNode
+  footer: React.ReactNode | null
 }) {
   const convoState = useConvoActive()
   const agent = useAgent()
@@ -427,11 +424,7 @@ export function MessagesList({
         />
       </ScrollProvider>
       <Animated.View style={animatedStickyViewStyle}>
-        {convoState.status === ConvoStatus.Disabled ? (
-          <ChatDisabled />
-        ) : blocked ? (
-          footer
-        ) : (
+        {footer || (
           <>
             {isConvoActive(convoState) &&
               !convoState.isFetchingHistory &&
diff --git a/src/state/messages/convo/agent.ts b/src/state/messages/convo/agent.ts
index 53d77046a2..32a9c41751 100644
--- a/src/state/messages/convo/agent.ts
+++ b/src/state/messages/convo/agent.ts
@@ -78,10 +78,13 @@ export class Convo {
 
   private emitter = new EventEmitter<{event: [ConvoEvent]}>()
 
+  private onMarkAsRead: () => void
+
   convoId: string
   convo: ChatBskyConvoDefs.ConvoView | undefined
   sender: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic | undefined
   recipients: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic[] | undefined = undefined
+  pendingAcceptance: boolean | undefined
   snapshot: ConvoState | undefined
 
   constructor(params: ConvoParams) {
@@ -89,7 +92,8 @@ export class Convo {
     this.convoId = params.convoId
     this.agent = params.agent
     this.events = params.events
-    this.senderUserDid = params.agent.session?.did!
+    this.senderUserDid = params.agent.session!.did
+    this.onMarkAsRead = params.onMarkAsRead
 
     this.subscribe = this.subscribe.bind(this)
     this.getSnapshot = this.getSnapshot.bind(this)
@@ -139,6 +143,7 @@ export class Convo {
           deleteMessage: undefined,
           sendMessage: undefined,
           fetchMessageHistory: undefined,
+          pendingAcceptance: undefined,
         }
       }
       case ConvoStatus.Disabled:
@@ -156,6 +161,7 @@ export class Convo {
           deleteMessage: this.deleteMessage,
           sendMessage: this.sendMessage,
           fetchMessageHistory: this.fetchMessageHistory,
+          pendingAcceptance: this.pendingAcceptance,
         }
       }
       case ConvoStatus.Error: {
@@ -170,6 +176,7 @@ export class Convo {
           deleteMessage: undefined,
           sendMessage: undefined,
           fetchMessageHistory: undefined,
+          pendingAcceptance: undefined,
         }
       }
       default: {
@@ -184,6 +191,7 @@ export class Convo {
           deleteMessage: undefined,
           sendMessage: undefined,
           fetchMessageHistory: undefined,
+          pendingAcceptance: undefined,
         }
       }
     }
@@ -246,11 +254,13 @@ export class Convo {
           case ConvoDispatchEvent.Resume: {
             this.refreshConvo()
             this.requestPollInterval(ACTIVE_POLL_INTERVAL)
+            this.markAsRead()
             break
           }
           case ConvoDispatchEvent.Background: {
             this.status = ConvoStatus.Backgrounded
             this.requestPollInterval(BACKGROUND_POLL_INTERVAL)
+            this.markAsRead()
             break
           }
           case ConvoDispatchEvent.Suspend: {
@@ -513,6 +523,7 @@ export class Convo {
         convo: ChatBskyConvoDefs.ConvoView
         sender: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic | undefined
         recipients: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic[]
+        pendingAcceptance: boolean
       }>
     | undefined
   async fetchConvo() {
@@ -522,10 +533,11 @@ export class Convo {
       convo: ChatBskyConvoDefs.ConvoView
       sender: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic | undefined
       recipients: AppBskyActorDefs.ProfileViewBasic[]
+      pendingAcceptance: boolean
     }>(async (resolve, reject) => {
       try {
         const response = await networkRetry(2, () => {
-          return this.agent.api.chat.bsky.convo.getConvo(
+          return this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.getConvo(
             {
               convoId: this.convoId,
             },
@@ -539,6 +551,7 @@ export class Convo {
           convo,
           sender: convo.members.find(m => m.did === this.senderUserDid),
           recipients: convo.members.filter(m => m.did !== this.senderUserDid),
+          pendingAcceptance: !convo.opened,
         })
       } catch (e) {
         reject(e)
@@ -552,11 +565,13 @@ export class Convo {
 
   async refreshConvo() {
     try {
-      const {convo, sender, recipients} = await this.fetchConvo()
+      const {convo, sender, recipients, pendingAcceptance} =
+        await this.fetchConvo()
       // throw new Error('UNCOMMENT TO TEST REFRESH FAILURE')
       this.convo = convo || this.convo
       this.sender = sender || this.sender
       this.recipients = recipients || this.recipients
+      this.pendingAcceptance = pendingAcceptance ?? this.pendingAcceptance
     } catch (e: any) {
       logger.error(e, {context: `Convo: failed to refresh convo`})
     }
@@ -592,7 +607,7 @@ export class Convo {
 
       const nextCursor = this.oldestRev // for TS
       const response = await networkRetry(2, () => {
-        return this.agent.api.chat.bsky.convo.getMessages(
+        return this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.getMessages(
           {
             cursor: nextCursor,
             convoId: this.convoId,
@@ -793,7 +808,7 @@ export class Convo {
 
       const {id, message} = pendingMessage
 
-      const response = await this.agent.api.chat.bsky.convo.sendMessage(
+      const response = await this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.sendMessage(
         {
           convoId: this.convoId,
           message,
@@ -888,7 +903,7 @@ export class Convo {
     )
 
     try {
-      const {data} = await this.agent.api.chat.bsky.convo.sendMessageBatch(
+      const {data} = await this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.sendMessageBatch(
         {
           items: messageArray.map(({message}) => ({
             convoId: this.convoId,
@@ -935,7 +950,7 @@ export class Convo {
 
     try {
       await networkRetry(2, () => {
-        return this.agent.api.chat.bsky.convo.deleteMessageForSelf(
+        return this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.deleteMessageForSelf(
           {
             convoId: this.convoId,
             messageId,
@@ -1104,4 +1119,21 @@ export class Convo {
         return item
       })
   }
+
+  async acceptChat() {
+    await this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.updateRead({
+      convoId: this.convoId,
+    })
+    this.pendingAcceptance = false
+    this.onMarkAsRead()
+  }
+
+  markAsRead() {
+    if (!this.pendingAcceptance) {
+      this.agent.chat.bsky.convo.updateRead({
+        convoId: this.convoId,
+      })
+      this.onMarkAsRead()
+    }
+  }
 }
diff --git a/src/state/messages/convo/index.tsx b/src/state/messages/convo/index.tsx
index 10ec2a348a..52eea47d74 100644
--- a/src/state/messages/convo/index.tsx
+++ b/src/state/messages/convo/index.tsx
@@ -3,6 +3,7 @@ import {useFocusEffect} from '@react-navigation/native'
 import {useQueryClient} from '@tanstack/react-query'
 
 import {useAppState} from '#/lib/hooks/useAppState'
+import {useNonReactiveCallback} from '#/lib/hooks/useNonReactiveCallback'
 import {Convo} from '#/state/messages/convo/agent'
 import {
   ConvoParams,
@@ -14,8 +15,10 @@ import {
 } from '#/state/messages/convo/types'
 import {isConvoActive} from '#/state/messages/convo/util'
 import {useMessagesEventBus} from '#/state/messages/events'
-import {useMarkAsReadMutation} from '#/state/queries/messages/conversation'
-import {RQKEY as ListConvosQueryKey} from '#/state/queries/messages/list-conversations'
+import {
+  RQKEY as ListConvosQueryKey,
+  useOnMarkAsRead,
+} from '#/state/queries/messages/list-conversations'
 import {RQKEY as createProfileQueryKey} from '#/state/queries/profile'
 import {useAgent} from '#/state/session'
 
@@ -60,16 +63,20 @@ export function ConvoProvider({
   const queryClient = useQueryClient()
   const agent = useAgent()
   const events = useMessagesEventBus()
+  const onMarkAsRead = useOnMarkAsRead()
+  const stableMAR = useNonReactiveCallback(() => {
+    onMarkAsRead(convoId)
+  })
   const [convo] = useState(
     () =>
       new Convo({
         convoId,
         agent,
         events,
+        onMarkAsRead: stableMAR,
       }),
   )
   const service = useSyncExternalStore(convo.subscribe, convo.getSnapshot)
-  const {mutate: markAsRead} = useMarkAsReadMutation()
 
   const appState = useAppState()
   const isActive = appState === 'active'
@@ -77,14 +84,12 @@ export function ConvoProvider({
     React.useCallback(() => {
       if (isActive) {
         convo.resume()
-        markAsRead({convoId})
 
         return () => {
           convo.background()
-          markAsRead({convoId})
         }
       }
-    }, [isActive, convo, convoId, markAsRead]),
+    }, [isActive, convo]),
   )
 
   React.useEffect(() => {
diff --git a/src/state/messages/convo/types.ts b/src/state/messages/convo/types.ts
index 21772262ea..0ab095c618 100644
--- a/src/state/messages/convo/types.ts
+++ b/src/state/messages/convo/types.ts
@@ -11,6 +11,7 @@ export type ConvoParams = {
   convoId: string
   agent: BskyAgent
   events: MessagesEventBus
+  onMarkAsRead: () => void
 }
 
 export enum ConvoStatus {
@@ -150,6 +151,7 @@ export type ConvoStateUninitialized = {
   deleteMessage: undefined
   sendMessage: undefined
   fetchMessageHistory: undefined
+  pendingAcceptance: undefined
 }
 export type ConvoStateInitializing = {
   status: ConvoStatus.Initializing
@@ -162,6 +164,7 @@ export type ConvoStateInitializing = {
   deleteMessage: undefined
   sendMessage: undefined
   fetchMessageHistory: undefined
+  pendingAcceptance: undefined
 }
 export type ConvoStateReady = {
   status: ConvoStatus.Ready
@@ -174,6 +177,7 @@ export type ConvoStateReady = {
   deleteMessage: DeleteMessage
   sendMessage: SendMessage
   fetchMessageHistory: FetchMessageHistory
+  pendingAcceptance: boolean | undefined
 }
 export type ConvoStateBackgrounded = {
   status: ConvoStatus.Backgrounded
@@ -186,6 +190,7 @@ export type ConvoStateBackgrounded = {
   deleteMessage: DeleteMessage
   sendMessage: SendMessage
   fetchMessageHistory: FetchMessageHistory
+  pendingAcceptance: boolean | undefined
 }
 export type ConvoStateSuspended = {
   status: ConvoStatus.Suspended
@@ -198,6 +203,7 @@ export type ConvoStateSuspended = {
   deleteMessage: DeleteMessage
   sendMessage: SendMessage
   fetchMessageHistory: FetchMessageHistory
+  pendingAcceptance: boolean | undefined
 }
 export type ConvoStateError = {
   status: ConvoStatus.Error
@@ -210,6 +216,7 @@ export type ConvoStateError = {
   deleteMessage: undefined
   sendMessage: undefined
   fetchMessageHistory: undefined
+  pendingAcceptance: undefined
 }
 export type ConvoStateDisabled = {
   status: ConvoStatus.Disabled
@@ -222,6 +229,7 @@ export type ConvoStateDisabled = {
   deleteMessage: DeleteMessage
   sendMessage: SendMessage
   fetchMessageHistory: FetchMessageHistory
+  pendingAcceptance: boolean | undefined
 }
 export type ConvoState =
   | ConvoStateUninitialized